You are ready to enjoy yourself today, but it might not be as simple as you expect. You are willing to play, yet something holds you back from fully participating in the present moment. It's a challenge to balance your desire for pleasure now with your need to establish a deeper and more intimate connection. There's no reason for endless analysis. Just keep bringing your attention back to the current situation and act from your heart, not your head.
-------------
I'm not usually into horoscopes, but this is pretty spot on. *sigh*
Boys. Can't live with 'em, can't live without 'em.
Wednesday, June 10, 2009
Sunday, May 10, 2009
Calmness in LA
So I took a spontaneous Road Trip with Kevin to Los Angeles to surprise my mom for Mothers Day. It worked! Ty also went home to surprise his mom, too. It's one big ball of surprisingness in LA.
I always get mixed feelings about coming home. Who do you tell you're in town? It gets really hard cause you don't want to offend anyone but at the same time you don't want to feel overwhelmed. Well, I didn't really tell anyone I was coming down. I think that was the right strategy.
I haven't been back to LA since Christmas. Quite possibly my longest time away from home. I started to miss my family and a couple of places here and there. I often forget all that is LA. The traffic, the smog, the heat, the rice rockets, the pretty people, the hydraulics, the police chases, the plastic surgery, etc. I miss aspects of LA and I still get a sense of 'home,' at least when I come to the Valley. I love driving down Ventura Boulevard. It's like the Valley's only sense of Urban-ness. I don't think I'd move back anytime soon. But I do miss the feeling of a sense of calm when I'm at home. I'm not sure if it's worth it considering all the stress that would come along with traffic and the rest of LA bullsh*t.
I don't really have a point to this entry more than saying, I'm home... and I'm glad I came spontaneously. :)
I always get mixed feelings about coming home. Who do you tell you're in town? It gets really hard cause you don't want to offend anyone but at the same time you don't want to feel overwhelmed. Well, I didn't really tell anyone I was coming down. I think that was the right strategy.
I haven't been back to LA since Christmas. Quite possibly my longest time away from home. I started to miss my family and a couple of places here and there. I often forget all that is LA. The traffic, the smog, the heat, the rice rockets, the pretty people, the hydraulics, the police chases, the plastic surgery, etc. I miss aspects of LA and I still get a sense of 'home,' at least when I come to the Valley. I love driving down Ventura Boulevard. It's like the Valley's only sense of Urban-ness. I don't think I'd move back anytime soon. But I do miss the feeling of a sense of calm when I'm at home. I'm not sure if it's worth it considering all the stress that would come along with traffic and the rest of LA bullsh*t.
I don't really have a point to this entry more than saying, I'm home... and I'm glad I came spontaneously. :)
Monday, May 04, 2009
TFLN is the new FML
So it seems nowadays that niche funny websites are all the rage. Inevitably the way to make money from these websites, say beyond AdSense, is to get a book deal.
Some of my favorite niche humorous websites include:
Some of my favorite niche humorous websites include:
- FML or Fuck My Life - A website that chronicles the shitty things that happen in people's lives. fmylife.com
- Stuff White People Like - A website that chronicles... um... stuff white people like... in a satirical way. stuffwhitepeoplelike.com
- People Who Deserve It - A website that discuss people who deserve to get punched in the face. Say you know... the person who brings 12 items in a 10 items or less line. peoplewhodeserveit.com
- Super Useless Super Powers - Exactly what it sounds like. It chronicles ideas of really useless super powers. :D http://superuseless.blogspot.com/
However, I will be adding a new one to the list. Drumroll...
- Texts from Last Night - A website that has text convos from people that are probably better left not shared with the public. Some awesome one liners! Textsfromlastnight.com
Friday, March 20, 2009
Dinner Date: Eggplant Parmesean & Late Harvest Chardonnay
Last night I had a dinner date with Lee. We did some shopping at Trader Joes before hand and headed to his apartment to cook and chat up a storm. We made this eggplant parmesean-ish dish with some italian sausage. It was really good. It was also just really fun to cook together. We listened to some tunes on his 'Chill Mix.'
I also got a chance to open up a bottle of wine I had sitting around at my apartment. It was the 2006 Cinnabar Late Harvest Chardonnay Dessert Wine. Boy was it amazing. Glad I brought it along.
I love chatting with him. We have so much in common it's pretty crazy.
Next up, we're gonna go rock-climbing. That should be fun!
I also got a chance to open up a bottle of wine I had sitting around at my apartment. It was the 2006 Cinnabar Late Harvest Chardonnay Dessert Wine. Boy was it amazing. Glad I brought it along.
I love chatting with him. We have so much in common it's pretty crazy.
Next up, we're gonna go rock-climbing. That should be fun!
New Blog Title
I haven't lived in the Silicon Valley for over a month. I think I need to change the title of my blog.
Sunday, March 01, 2009
Netflix Film: Manhattan
So I started my Netflix subscription I got as a gift from my birthday last year. Haha... It's been forever. Thanks Sis.My first movie was a random choice. I went with Woody Allen's Manhattan. I went to NYC in January, so it's still pretty fresh in my mind.
The cinematography was amazing. It's filmed in black and white. I haven't seen some of that camera work before in films, even though it's quite old from 1979.
The film is mostly dramatic with a few good one liners. The cast was pretty stellar too.
The storyline is about romance and maturity. Woody Allen is into this 17 year old High School girl who's more mature than he is. He falls in love with his friend's extramarital affair of a woman (Diane Keaton). However, things don't quite go his way...
4 out of 5 stars
Saturday, February 21, 2009
Advertising in Digital Media for the Younger Generation
*Disclosure: I Work at YouTube*
I was having a conversation with Danny Reed while we were running the town amuck in Washington D.C. The topic of online ads in media came up.
He almost immediately talked about how he hated the pre-rolls on Hulu. That was his first gripe. It sorta surprised me (although I know the vast majority of the population prefer different forms of ads if given the choice in comparison to pre-rolls). I tend to hear from the older crowd (25+) that they're cool with pre-rolls. But the younger generation is WAY too impatient for a 15 second pre-roll.
I wonder if Online Media Distrubutors like YouTube and Hulu will actually let users set preferences to what types of ads they want to see. I guess it will come down to what the average CPM is for each form of advertisement.
I was having a conversation with Danny Reed while we were running the town amuck in Washington D.C. The topic of online ads in media came up.
He almost immediately talked about how he hated the pre-rolls on Hulu. That was his first gripe. It sorta surprised me (although I know the vast majority of the population prefer different forms of ads if given the choice in comparison to pre-rolls). I tend to hear from the older crowd (25+) that they're cool with pre-rolls. But the younger generation is WAY too impatient for a 15 second pre-roll.
I wonder if Online Media Distrubutors like YouTube and Hulu will actually let users set preferences to what types of ads they want to see. I guess it will come down to what the average CPM is for each form of advertisement.
Sunday, February 15, 2009
Investing: Stick It Out
It's really easy to pull contributions or money out of investments during a tough economy.
But this presentation is quite convincing in arguing that 'Average Is Not Normal.' Essentially the stock market has averaged around 8-11% annual return. But that doesn't mean every year it has gains like that.
Look at this preso for more info:
But this presentation is quite convincing in arguing that 'Average Is Not Normal.' Essentially the stock market has averaged around 8-11% annual return. But that doesn't mean every year it has gains like that.
Look at this preso for more info:
Runners High
I love watching KQED. There's always something interesting to watch. I do DVR a few series, one being 'Truly CA.'
The latest episode, Runners High, is a truly inspiring story about an organization called Students Run Oakland (SRO) in which High School kids are trained to run in the Los Angeles Marathon. They get free running shoes to start off in their journey. However the ultimate goal is completing the marathon in Los Angeles. These kids aren't given many opportunities and at the end of the episode you get to see how several of the students progressed beyond High School.
The interesting thing is seeing the diversity of students - both physically and mentally - and how they approached the training. Some were larger, some were smaller. Most were out of shape to begin with. Many people bitched and moaned but were ultimately surprised with how much strain they could put on their body. It's a mental game. The documentary isn't so much about the Marathon as it is an analogy for life. You're gonna be faced with challenges, road blocks and other things in life. It's really about how you handle them, set goals and train your mind to get through them.
I definitely want to train to run a marathon, but start slow.
I know I can run a 5K (a little over 3 miles) in a little over 30 minutes. Next goal will be a 10K. I'll practice on the treadmill. :D
The Trailer
The latest episode, Runners High, is a truly inspiring story about an organization called Students Run Oakland (SRO) in which High School kids are trained to run in the Los Angeles Marathon. They get free running shoes to start off in their journey. However the ultimate goal is completing the marathon in Los Angeles. These kids aren't given many opportunities and at the end of the episode you get to see how several of the students progressed beyond High School.
The interesting thing is seeing the diversity of students - both physically and mentally - and how they approached the training. Some were larger, some were smaller. Most were out of shape to begin with. Many people bitched and moaned but were ultimately surprised with how much strain they could put on their body. It's a mental game. The documentary isn't so much about the Marathon as it is an analogy for life. You're gonna be faced with challenges, road blocks and other things in life. It's really about how you handle them, set goals and train your mind to get through them.
I definitely want to train to run a marathon, but start slow.
I know I can run a 5K (a little over 3 miles) in a little over 30 minutes. Next goal will be a 10K. I'll practice on the treadmill. :D
The Trailer
Friday, February 13, 2009
Straight Up Veto Power
Last weekend I was having a conversation at Verde with Adi when he talked about a concept he practices with his straight friends that I found fascinating and might even adapt into my life.
It's the concept of Straight Veto Power. Being a gay man in your 20's is a very difficult balance. You're getting to know yourself, the gay community and often times neglect your straight friends. You always end up doing 'gay things.' So Adi's straighties, once a month, get to veto a gay event that Adi goes to and instead hang out with him.
There may be cases where Adi looks like a flake because he said he would go somewhere but at the last minute gets struck down by the straighties.
I know that it sounds ridiculous having such a need for this power. But as it turns out, the gays like to plan... and plan a lot. We're talking having a calendar booked at least a month in advance. Thus BOOM... VETO POWER comes into play. :D
It's the concept of Straight Veto Power. Being a gay man in your 20's is a very difficult balance. You're getting to know yourself, the gay community and often times neglect your straight friends. You always end up doing 'gay things.' So Adi's straighties, once a month, get to veto a gay event that Adi goes to and instead hang out with him.
There may be cases where Adi looks like a flake because he said he would go somewhere but at the last minute gets struck down by the straighties.
I know that it sounds ridiculous having such a need for this power. But as it turns out, the gays like to plan... and plan a lot. We're talking having a calendar booked at least a month in advance. Thus BOOM... VETO POWER comes into play. :D
Naughty at work
Yesterday I had dinner with Nai at work after he got his Lasik check-up from his doctor.
Somehow the topic of people having sex at work came up. All I got to say is that I haven't laughed that hard at dinner with him in a long time. Dude... I miss hanging out with my main straightie.
Somehow the topic of people having sex at work came up. All I got to say is that I haven't laughed that hard at dinner with him in a long time. Dude... I miss hanging out with my main straightie.
Saturday, January 17, 2009
The Relation Between Racial Attraction & Weight Loss
There are so many topics I feel I can write about dealing with achieving a major weight loss. I probably should just make time to write a book about it.
One of the more intriguing and controversial has to deal with the gay racial hierarchy of perceived attractiveness. Whether we like to believe it or not, there is definitely a social hierarchy revolving around race in the gay community. Perceived physical attractiveness in the gay community has many factors --- one among them being race. Some might throw in masculinity, muscle build or height/weight ratio.
People can argue different points or opinions on the subject, but I'm going to present you what I feel is a pretty good correlation between my weight loss and the point in time a particular race found me attractive.
Here goes it:
~ 300 lbs --> Black Guys and Overweight guys found me attractive.
~ 250 lbs --> Latino Guys found me attractive
~ 200 lbs --> Asian Guys found me attractive
~ 175-180 lbs (Present) --> White Guys found me attractive.
This is not to say that Asian, Black or Latino guys now don't currently find me attractive, but it's at a certain point where there was clearly more interest from White guys.
Ty told me about a study he did in college about race and the gay community --- we both kind of agree about the underlying racial hierarchy in the gay community. There are obviously more races than those listed above. There are also subcategories of race... e.g. Vietnamese vs. Chinese that have some untold hierarchy in the gay community.
This observation was definitely more of an afterthought than something I noticed at the time it was happening. I find it intriguing and it's something I wouldn't mind doing more research on.
One of the more intriguing and controversial has to deal with the gay racial hierarchy of perceived attractiveness. Whether we like to believe it or not, there is definitely a social hierarchy revolving around race in the gay community. Perceived physical attractiveness in the gay community has many factors --- one among them being race. Some might throw in masculinity, muscle build or height/weight ratio.
People can argue different points or opinions on the subject, but I'm going to present you what I feel is a pretty good correlation between my weight loss and the point in time a particular race found me attractive.
Here goes it:
~ 300 lbs --> Black Guys and Overweight guys found me attractive.
~ 250 lbs --> Latino Guys found me attractive
~ 200 lbs --> Asian Guys found me attractive
~ 175-180 lbs (Present) --> White Guys found me attractive.
This is not to say that Asian, Black or Latino guys now don't currently find me attractive, but it's at a certain point where there was clearly more interest from White guys.
Ty told me about a study he did in college about race and the gay community --- we both kind of agree about the underlying racial hierarchy in the gay community. There are obviously more races than those listed above. There are also subcategories of race... e.g. Vietnamese vs. Chinese that have some untold hierarchy in the gay community.
This observation was definitely more of an afterthought than something I noticed at the time it was happening. I find it intriguing and it's something I wouldn't mind doing more research on.
When dating doesn't work out: The Mr. Y aftermath
So I really never wrote about this, but me and Mr. Y had a conversation after Christmas about how I felt about him. I really wanted to date Mr. Y but at one point in my heart of hearts I realized he wasn't interested. This was probably around early December. I of course didn't want to believe this so I kept my pursuit on.
My heart needed a concrete answer to more forward either way. How it all went down as far as me telling Mr. Y that I liked him and was interested in something beyond friendship was kinda amusing. Mr. Y told my friend Ty that he wasn't interested in dating me one night while we were clubbing with friends. Ultimately Mr. Y knew he would have to tell me in person how he felt too.
In the meantime, I didn't know this and decided to set up a coffee convo with Mr. Y to let him know how I felt about him. At first I was kind of surprised he agreed because Mr. Y was a bit stand-off-ish the prior evening when we hung out with our group of friends in LA. I give Ty a call to let him know what I was going to do and also just asked him to recap the previous night because I was so drunk I blacked out much of the evening (First time, ever, mind you.) Side Note: To be completely honest, I decided to drink because I knew Mr. Y wasn't interested and I just wanted to have fun. Apparently I'm a cheap date and my tolerance is uber low.
I digress. So Ty and I have a phone conversation where he was like '3 things happened last night, two of which you should be proud of --- but there is a bit of bad news.' I wasn't entirely sure what was about to come. Ty broke it down at first and started with the two positives:
Fast forward back to the day after when a coffee date was scheduled. I get a hold of Mr. Y on the phone to set up deets of the coffee excursion. I pretty much start off by letting him know that Ty told me everything they talked about the night prior but I still think we should meet in person to discuss everything and clear it up. It was sorta nice because now I knew going into the convo what was going to happen. Instead of the original scenario, where I knew nothing and woulda looked like a fool being shocked upon rejection, I knew walking into the coffee talk that I would be rejected.
Mr. Y and I hung out in Old Town Pasadena, grabbed some Tea/Coffee at Cafe Alibi and chatted outside in their garden. The conversation was very interesting and heartfelt. I upfront set up the expectations that I expect nothing but honesty to come out of this and I prefer the truth over anything sugarcoated. That evening was the closest I felt to Mr. Y ever. Ironic how a rejection conversation brings you closer as friends.
I let him know that I appreciated that he took the time out to chat when we both were winding down our holiday vacation stay in LA when time was a bit precious with friends and family.
He let me know that 'As cheesy as this sounds, I don't want to lose you as a friend.' Mr. Y cheered me up and we both decided to stroll a bit longer in Old Town because 'Fuck, we paid for parking!'
We went to a book store and checked out the Sexstrology book I had referenced prior in the afternoon. We both got a good laugh.
I let Mr. Y know that It's going to take a while for my feelings to subside, but I'm cool with being friends. Often times people say 'Let's be friends' when the really mean, "Um, I actually don't want to make the time for you, but It sounds better if I say 'Let's Be Friends!"
Ultimately I feel comfortable telling Mr. Y things I notice, even if I feel he may think it's awkward. I let him know I noticed he was avoiding dancing with me if we ever went out clubbing. I think subconsciously so was I, so no feelings would come back.
The best part about the whole thing is that we have a stronger friendship in comparison to anything we had while we were dating (for lack of a better word because I'm sure he'll say we never really dated... but whatevs).
Even though I've only know Mr. Y since October '08, I feel really comfortable around him to tell him anything that's on my mind. Occasionally we're both silent after we say something to each other and we're unsure of what the other is thinking, but I'm amused by that.
One of the best things is that Mr. Y lets me know he's thankful he has me as a good friend. I let him know the same...
My heart needed a concrete answer to more forward either way. How it all went down as far as me telling Mr. Y that I liked him and was interested in something beyond friendship was kinda amusing. Mr. Y told my friend Ty that he wasn't interested in dating me one night while we were clubbing with friends. Ultimately Mr. Y knew he would have to tell me in person how he felt too.
In the meantime, I didn't know this and decided to set up a coffee convo with Mr. Y to let him know how I felt about him. At first I was kind of surprised he agreed because Mr. Y was a bit stand-off-ish the prior evening when we hung out with our group of friends in LA. I give Ty a call to let him know what I was going to do and also just asked him to recap the previous night because I was so drunk I blacked out much of the evening (First time, ever, mind you.) Side Note: To be completely honest, I decided to drink because I knew Mr. Y wasn't interested and I just wanted to have fun. Apparently I'm a cheap date and my tolerance is uber low.
I digress. So Ty and I have a phone conversation where he was like '3 things happened last night, two of which you should be proud of --- but there is a bit of bad news.' I wasn't entirely sure what was about to come. Ty broke it down at first and started with the two positives:
- You met Anthony and there seems to be mutual interest.
- You made out with Chris. (Really, I didn't want that at all... not entirely sure how that happened... oh wait, it was the alcohol.) Chris asked me out on a date the next day.
- He said Mr. Y and him stepped outside the club last night. Mr. Y told Ty that there was no interest on his end.
Fast forward back to the day after when a coffee date was scheduled. I get a hold of Mr. Y on the phone to set up deets of the coffee excursion. I pretty much start off by letting him know that Ty told me everything they talked about the night prior but I still think we should meet in person to discuss everything and clear it up. It was sorta nice because now I knew going into the convo what was going to happen. Instead of the original scenario, where I knew nothing and woulda looked like a fool being shocked upon rejection, I knew walking into the coffee talk that I would be rejected.
Mr. Y and I hung out in Old Town Pasadena, grabbed some Tea/Coffee at Cafe Alibi and chatted outside in their garden. The conversation was very interesting and heartfelt. I upfront set up the expectations that I expect nothing but honesty to come out of this and I prefer the truth over anything sugarcoated. That evening was the closest I felt to Mr. Y ever. Ironic how a rejection conversation brings you closer as friends.
I let him know that I appreciated that he took the time out to chat when we both were winding down our holiday vacation stay in LA when time was a bit precious with friends and family.
He let me know that 'As cheesy as this sounds, I don't want to lose you as a friend.' Mr. Y cheered me up and we both decided to stroll a bit longer in Old Town because 'Fuck, we paid for parking!'
We went to a book store and checked out the Sexstrology book I had referenced prior in the afternoon. We both got a good laugh.
I let Mr. Y know that It's going to take a while for my feelings to subside, but I'm cool with being friends. Often times people say 'Let's be friends' when the really mean, "Um, I actually don't want to make the time for you, but It sounds better if I say 'Let's Be Friends!"
Ultimately I feel comfortable telling Mr. Y things I notice, even if I feel he may think it's awkward. I let him know I noticed he was avoiding dancing with me if we ever went out clubbing. I think subconsciously so was I, so no feelings would come back.
The best part about the whole thing is that we have a stronger friendship in comparison to anything we had while we were dating (for lack of a better word because I'm sure he'll say we never really dated... but whatevs).
Even though I've only know Mr. Y since October '08, I feel really comfortable around him to tell him anything that's on my mind. Occasionally we're both silent after we say something to each other and we're unsure of what the other is thinking, but I'm amused by that.
One of the best things is that Mr. Y lets me know he's thankful he has me as a good friend. I let him know the same...
Getting over guys
I haven't been in long enough of a relationship to know what it feels like to get over a guy. If I get rejected or something fizzles, it usually takes me about 3 weeks to a month to re-coop and adjust.
I've only had 3ish month relationships, so I'm not sure how I would handle a breakup of a year +. I often have to sympathize with friends who've been in 1, 2, 3, 4, or 5 year relationships when they end. I'm sure it's no fun. In many of those cases, I feel like you're gonna need at least a year to recoop to feel like you're ready for another relationship.
I'm not quite sure I envy the feeling of friends who've gone through this, but even my short stints of having to get over a guy hurts. I can only imagine the pain my friends have gone through when they have a breakup of long term relationship.
What I do know is that if there is one side with feelings, it's probably best to not be in contact with your ex. It's like a constant reminder of what could have been. Sure, people say 'Oh... we can make being friends work out.' I beg to differ when the breakup is over a long term relationship when one side still has feelings. It's not to say down the road when both sides are more healthy that it's not possible to be friends.
In particular it's really hard to give the above advice (re: cut off contact) to friends who've had long-term relationship breakups. It's not what they want to hear. But I think it's the best solution and what the doctor would order...
I've only had 3ish month relationships, so I'm not sure how I would handle a breakup of a year +. I often have to sympathize with friends who've been in 1, 2, 3, 4, or 5 year relationships when they end. I'm sure it's no fun. In many of those cases, I feel like you're gonna need at least a year to recoop to feel like you're ready for another relationship.
I'm not quite sure I envy the feeling of friends who've gone through this, but even my short stints of having to get over a guy hurts. I can only imagine the pain my friends have gone through when they have a breakup of long term relationship.
What I do know is that if there is one side with feelings, it's probably best to not be in contact with your ex. It's like a constant reminder of what could have been. Sure, people say 'Oh... we can make being friends work out.' I beg to differ when the breakup is over a long term relationship when one side still has feelings. It's not to say down the road when both sides are more healthy that it's not possible to be friends.
In particular it's really hard to give the above advice (re: cut off contact) to friends who've had long-term relationship breakups. It's not what they want to hear. But I think it's the best solution and what the doctor would order...
Tuesday, January 13, 2009
Engagement
So one of my best friends, Jonathan, just got engaged according to Facebook. We go way back --- grade school but became really close in High School.
I'm not entirely certain what I'm supposed to feel, other than happy and congratulate him. He deserves to be really happy after all he's been through in his life.
I haven't seen him in a while --- mainly because he's been attached like no other to the girl he just got engaged to.
So out of the High School 4 (Me, Jonathan, Angelo and Sherif) --- Jonathan gets engaged first. Congrats!
I'm not entirely certain what I'm supposed to feel, other than happy and congratulate him. He deserves to be really happy after all he's been through in his life.
I haven't seen him in a while --- mainly because he's been attached like no other to the girl he just got engaged to.
So out of the High School 4 (Me, Jonathan, Angelo and Sherif) --- Jonathan gets engaged first. Congrats!
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