I can say that it's been a blessing having been a little MIA for the past month. I've caught up on sleep for one thing. It's helped improve my mood exponentially.
I guess the theme of the past year is that I've overexposed myself to too many things --- in a way spreading myself too thin. I got burnt out pretty easily as I didn't have enough me time. I think a lot of that stems from a few different things. First, I've only really had a social life for the past 3 years. 3 years out of 26 (well, nearly 27). To use an analogy, I was kinda like a kid in a candy store and just stuffed everything in my mouth because I never really ever had candy, but always heard about it. Secondly, I admittedly have an addictive personality. I tend to go to extremes before re-calibrating and finding a balance.
The past two days I've gone out socially and people have been very very kind often mentioning positive words. They've said things along the lines of "It's been too long. It's nice to see you out." or "You're looking really good." or "Keep up the good work." or just... "Why haven't I seen you?" "What have you been up to?" It didn't really matter so much to me as to the content of what people said, but it was nice that they took a second to think about me or engage with me. I've always tried to do that with others.
Some things that have changed (re-calibrating, if you will), resulting in a postive self image and mood improvement:
A few funny things happened the last few days with respect to outward appearance. People haven't physically recognized me. Really. I can't even remember the last time someone has said something about that to me --- probably 2007 or early 2008? After the shock of seeing a 300 lb guy turn into a 180 lb guy.
A couple of days ago, I was out with my roommate Greg and he turned around and said, "Will?... Will?" I thought to myself -- "What?... What?" Greg later confessed to me last night that he didn't recognize me at first and pondered, "Who's that guy? He's cute." Thus the "Will?" was a moment of shock after Greg realized it was his roommate he was looking at.
Also last night my friend Kevin's ex, Andy, had a similar experience in so far as he turned around, turned back and did a double take. He later said, "Will. I didn't recognize you. What a studly guy."
Now outwardly, I don't think much has changed physically with me. I appear a bit tanner, have a wee bit of scruff, and my hair is slightly longer than how I'd normally have it. Other than that, I can't think of anything else. But what would cause people to not recognize me?
Now I'm curious as to whether all of the changes above have had a shift in outward appearance? I've generally focused on exercise for that in the past. But the fact I'm doing less of it... what could possibly be leading to a change in outward appearance to make people not recognize me?
In the end, It's natural to have ups and downs --- but I have to remember to keep it from going to extremes. When you remove yourself for a bit --- even for just a little while --- it gets people to actually think about you more. People would wonder what you've been up to as opposed just being fed information about yourself from a website.
I guess the theme of the past year is that I've overexposed myself to too many things --- in a way spreading myself too thin. I got burnt out pretty easily as I didn't have enough me time. I think a lot of that stems from a few different things. First, I've only really had a social life for the past 3 years. 3 years out of 26 (well, nearly 27). To use an analogy, I was kinda like a kid in a candy store and just stuffed everything in my mouth because I never really ever had candy, but always heard about it. Secondly, I admittedly have an addictive personality. I tend to go to extremes before re-calibrating and finding a balance.
The past two days I've gone out socially and people have been very very kind often mentioning positive words. They've said things along the lines of "It's been too long. It's nice to see you out." or "You're looking really good." or "Keep up the good work." or just... "Why haven't I seen you?" "What have you been up to?" It didn't really matter so much to me as to the content of what people said, but it was nice that they took a second to think about me or engage with me. I've always tried to do that with others.
Some things that have changed (re-calibrating, if you will), resulting in a postive self image and mood improvement:
- Less exercise - Sounds sort of unintuitive, right? I've actually been less anal about this than I have in the past. Not to say that I don't exercise, but I'm okay with missing some days, especially when my body is telling me it's tired. I'll try to make it up in some fashion --- walking outside more and taking mass transit rather than driving. I don't think I've quite found a proper routine yet, but I'll be figuring that out soon.
- More sleep - I've been sleeping earlier, resulting on average about 7 to 8 hours nightly. I've also been waking up earlier, which leads to a fairly clear mind in the morning. I'm now one of the first people into work instead of one of the last.
- Less consumption of food - There was a period in the least year or so, probably since I've moved to San Francisco, as to I probably started to consume more food than my body needed and it was out of sync. I'd often feel full and never hungry but would continue to eat figuring my metabolism would appreciate it. I probably gained about 7ish pounds during this time. Not horrible, but not great. Decreasing food consumption has led me to remember what it feels like to be hungry again. I also just have had less of an appetite for a variety of reasons.
- More doing of the things I love - Including seeing people I haven't seen in ages, spending time with family, visiting museums, watching movies, experimenting with photography, writing, going to concerts, etc.
- Not drinking excessively - I've had about 2 drinks in the past month. I've essentially cut out all alcohol, similarly to how I did for the years I was losing weight. It saves cash and you can feel better about yourself the next day. :)
- Spending time with myself - Sounds lame, I know. I've actually done quite a few things independently mainly because I still would do something even if I couldn't find someone who would also enjoy going.
- Saying No More - I always thought I had to say "Yes" to things. I later realized I didn't. My natural instinct was to then have an excuse as to why I didn't say "Yes." I also then realized, that I don't have to have one. "No" should simply be enough.
- Stop with the social networking, or at least use it more for what its purpose is for - I went 3 weeks without using Facebook. People actually asked me if I was okay. I guess it did come off as a shock to some. I focused on writing instead. I did sync my Posterous blog with a few social media sites (blogger, twitter, etc.) but I strategically left it off Facebook. I don't want my inner most thoughts being spread that thin. I even had one of my friends who works at Facebook say to me -- "Really Will? You're using Posterous over Facebook? You do know we have notes and filters." I then thought... why? This really isn't for others in so much if others choose to read my writing, great. Why use a platform that actually spreads it widely to people who actually know me?
- Think more critically about what I want in the next 3-5 years - I think most people hit their "peek of passion" as I like to call it when they graduate college. Bright eyed - thinking they can conquer the world - and then reality sets in. Passion for things one loves often wains over time --- mainly because our minds get clouded in one way or another. The longer you can hold on to the "peek of passion," I think the happier one is. Not to say you can't get it back, but many times it takes a painful reality check for it to happen. Thus, I've begun to think more about what drives my passion and how I can leverage that in the upcoming years.
A few funny things happened the last few days with respect to outward appearance. People haven't physically recognized me. Really. I can't even remember the last time someone has said something about that to me --- probably 2007 or early 2008? After the shock of seeing a 300 lb guy turn into a 180 lb guy.
A couple of days ago, I was out with my roommate Greg and he turned around and said, "Will?... Will?" I thought to myself -- "What?... What?" Greg later confessed to me last night that he didn't recognize me at first and pondered, "Who's that guy? He's cute." Thus the "Will?" was a moment of shock after Greg realized it was his roommate he was looking at.
Also last night my friend Kevin's ex, Andy, had a similar experience in so far as he turned around, turned back and did a double take. He later said, "Will. I didn't recognize you. What a studly guy."
Now outwardly, I don't think much has changed physically with me. I appear a bit tanner, have a wee bit of scruff, and my hair is slightly longer than how I'd normally have it. Other than that, I can't think of anything else. But what would cause people to not recognize me?
Now I'm curious as to whether all of the changes above have had a shift in outward appearance? I've generally focused on exercise for that in the past. But the fact I'm doing less of it... what could possibly be leading to a change in outward appearance to make people not recognize me?
In the end, It's natural to have ups and downs --- but I have to remember to keep it from going to extremes. When you remove yourself for a bit --- even for just a little while --- it gets people to actually think about you more. People would wonder what you've been up to as opposed just being fed information about yourself from a website.
